Wanting...

I saw a man in a suit on the screen with his back turned towards me.. And it reminded me of someone who felt a lot like the cassette collection I had since I was a child who's surface were stained with my once upon daily fingerprints... I knew if I brought them out in today's air , they'd feel like my fingerprints... Indifferent to time.... Immortal germs... All mine...

But I couldn't see this face... It was like how you can't understand the sound of your own voice..?? Or lick your own chin... It's ridiculous..! You're anticipating the satisfaction of its taste on the surface of your tongue... It doesn't happen. 

Failing.

2016 has been the most challenging year of my life so far. I didn't know i could go this far.
I didn't know I could be this demotivated to go any further.
I didn't know I would nevertheless not have an option.

Love is a beautiful thing.
Sometimes you shred pieces of yourself to feed these things you love ..
to keep them alive....
But you see them burning ...
unaware of your efforts...
unaware of you..
you die...

but you can't....
you can't let them die...

except you don't have any of you left to feed...
and they stand there asking you ...
what love is greater...?

In this hour of loss and desperation...

they question you.

because you haven't been able to save them.

because they say things that matter make it through...

what about the itching ashes aching to fly once they've broken through their cage...

their screams still hopeful when they lie in their cold death.

And this love...
stands there ..
looks you in the eye with disgust...
accusing you of this murder...






picture credits - death by diamonds and pearls. carioca studio. 

Failing.

2016 has been the most challenging year of my life so far.I didn't know i could go this far.
I didn't know I could be this demotivated to go any further.
I didn't know I would nevertheless not have an option.

Love is a beautiful thing.
Sometimes you shred pieces of yourself to feed these things you love ..
to keep them alive....
But you see them burning ...
unaware of your efforts...
unaware of you..
you die...

but you can't....
you can't let them die...

except you don't have any of you left to feed...
and they stand there asking you ...
what love is greater...?

In this hour of loss and desperation...

they question you.

because you haven't been able to save them.

because they say things that matter make it through...

what about the itching ashes aching to fly once they've broken through their cage...

their screams still hopeful when they lie in their cold death.

And this love...
stands there ..
looks you in the eye with disgust...
accusing you of this murder...






picture credits - death by diamonds and pearls. carioca studio. 

We know nothing....

You know what you know... But you also know how knowing might wind up...
You know what matters...
But you also know what else matters.....
In the long run....
So can we shake on not knowing a few things.....?

But the thing is....
We know....

Yes....
But we also know....

Done

Drift away.....
I don't feel like seeing you anymore....
I don't feel like being this anymore.....
Pass....
My eyes will not follow you....
I will lay....
Motionless....
Nothing will replace you....
I'm throwing away the space itself....
I don't feel like holding on to even your absence....
I'm forgetting all the thoughts.....
I don't feel like recalling....
Float away....
I just want to drink my tea.....

Listen......

i hear a song echoing the forecoming nostalgia in this random room in a random world.........
only i hear it.......
i see them .....
they don't hear it......even if they did...
they won't know......
the language is strange wilderness....
unknown......
they'd hear the music...
they won't feel the words hidden in the folds of those notes......

or maybe they will...

Window,,,,,

                                                                                                                                                       

Stared through the cool shades
of olive and strolling light...
whispering echoes through the
musky wood and metal threads 
of a witnessing window. 

You could never decode her silence. 

Was she the stern surveillance that etched your horizon with her unyielding eyebrow..?

Or did she beckon you to cross over and mingle with the stir of melodiously quiet wind..?? 

Or was she both..?? 

Or were you human enough to make that choice for yourself.....????